Never trust your heart. That flies in the face of what we so often hear in today’s society. We are told to trust our heart, trust our gut, trust our intellect. Pssshhh! That is ridiculous. I certainly don’t want to rely on myself. I know myself pretty well… more than anyone else, right? I cannot be trusted. Oh, I am trustworthy, that is not what I mean. I cannot trust my feelings. They are far too fickle.
Last night is a prime example of what I am talking about. I was feeling down, considering the state of my day to day life, contemplating my upcoming 50th birthday and am I where I wanted to be at this age? What have I done? What am I doing? Am I accomplishing my goals? Realizing my dreams? You can fill in the rest…..most of us have gone down that road at some point. If you haven’t yet, just wait. You will.
I went to bed last night feeling sorry for myself, sure that I was going wake up feeling stressed and well, stressed. Instead, after a good night’s sleep, I woke up in a better mood. I was no longer under the gray cloud of what if’s?
Feelings change, much like a real-life roller coaster. Somedays you’re plunging down hills at break-neck speed, wondering if you’ll ever lose that weight, get the degree, run the marathon, paint the picture, take the road trip, make the call, and disguise the wrinkles. Other days, you’re soaring to the top, heading for the clouds, the wind whipping through your hair…and life is good.
God had something to say about the heart and feelings. He knows how we are. He knows we don’t understand why we do what we do, or why we feel like we feel….even when it makes no sense.
The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9 NIV
Last night, I was sure my current mission field felt more like a mud pit. I was covered in the muck of the mundane. Muddy and messy and I was sinking. This morning as those thoughts entered my mind, this verse came to me, calming my anxious heart.
I waited patiently for the LORD; And He inclined to me and heard my cry. He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay, And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear And will trust in the LORD.… Psalm 40:1-3 NASB
He set my feet upon a rock……. I am going to be okay.