It Is An Ongoing Process


I try hard to lead a balanced life.

I am learning it is okay to say “no” to things.

I am trying to simplify, so I can focus on the important.

It is an ongoing process, in my day to day life.

On some days I struggle with it more than others.

The earth at times seems to lean heavy on the hard things. The scary things, the painful. I wish it wasn’t this way. Yesterday, I found out a sweet young friend is struggling quietly with chronic health issues that I knew nothing about, another friend, who is now a grandma, waited last night for her grandson to be born, watching her daughter tense with pain from a 30+ hour labor. Yet, another teacher friend, told of her student who had special needs, that had passed away……and the earth continues to spin, making me dizzy with it all.

While taking a shower the tears flow, mixed with hot spray, both are washed down the drain. Cleansing the body, washing the soul. There is, all too often, much to cry about…..but, I cannot stay at this place.

For all the hard edges of this world, all the diagnoses, the pain, the sorrow, the scary nights, the close calls, and the misunderstandings…..there is still so much more to be thankful for. Being able to see the light in the darkness is a true gift. I consider it a wonderful opportunity to be able to offer thanks.

There are moments when I feel as if time is suspended and I am standing in slow motion, being allowed the privilege to truly see…to live this one life with my eyes wide open to all there is instead of all there isn’t.

The kind of life I will live, has much to do with where I keep my focus.

I am thankful for: 

*pulling the curtains back on a glorious pink and purple morning

*the soft padding of my footsteps as I let the dog out for his morning walk

*the rooster who crows a good morning, telling the world it is time to get up

*emails from friends with good news

*a chill in the air, even in late May

*getting my car back from the garage, driving down Main Street

*rabbits that run across the road ahead of me

*a new cria (baby llama)

*a kiss on the forehead before leaving for work, from my 20 year old son

*a daughter who is graduating in two days

*a husband that I love, and loves me back

*fence posts and wide open fields

*blue expanse of sky that kisses the horizon

*bright red barns with horses grazing

*freshly planted fields that will soon be sprouting

*lovely birthday cards and gifts, and a treat that arrived from Amazon

*phone call with my mom and sister….hearts touch over the miles

*looking forward to a family wedding in June

*Thank you, God. You are the giver of daily gifts. Some big. Some small. All valuable.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17