Have you ever read something and realized it was YOU the writer was talking about? Okay, well maybe not really you, but it may as well have been. The words hit so close to home that you look over your shoulder to see if anyone is watching you, as you read…
I’ve finished One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. I’m reading it again. It’s that good. On pages 168-169, Ann discusses “expectations”. During book club it was discussed that expectations are premeditated resentments.
How many times have I let my expectations, ruin the moment? How many times have I expected something, only to see that others can’t meet that bar? How many times have I expected perfection in the moment, only to be sorely disappointed? I struggle with the way I think things “should be”. When things don’t turn out the way I had hoped, I am left frazzled, irritated, and resentful.
Resentment. I know it well. I wish I didn’t.
That insidious word, feeling, has stolen my joy on numerous occasions.
It builds up inside of me, until it blinds me to all else. I can no longer see the joy of the moment because resentment has me standing in darkness.
I bite the words as they come out of my mouth. Hard and bitter.
I need to let the expectations go.
Do I want to enjoy the moment that God gave me, or do I want to “be right”?
“Expectations, kill relationships”, Ann surmises. I tend to agree.
I’m a work in progress.
Joy is in the moment.
I’m learning to “let go” so I can enjoy the moments God has given me. The lessons are not simple, nor easy.
All of life is learning.
It’s hard to stay resentful… if I’m giving thanks. The two don’t mix well. I will continue with eucharisteo.
We are discussing “letting go” this week at A Holy Experience. If you would like to read more, click on my Walk With Him Wednesdays graphic on my right side bar.
- Forgiveness, Part 3 (caregiving.com)
- The Power of Releasing Resentments: A Holiday and New Year’s Gift to Yourself and Others (psychologytoday.com)
- All stressed out and nowhere to vent (simplyconnectingdots.wordpress.com)
- Forgiveness (tmlloyd.wordpress.com)
- Letting Go (gibsongirl247.wordpress.com)
- Letting go (karunamettacat.wordpress.com)
I have experienced exactly what you are talking about. Sometimes, when we set expectations we are setting ourselves up for a hard fall of disappointment whereas, if we just let it flow and allow God to do His work, we will most likely experience great joy!
I tell myself often to “check my expectations at the door”. It;s so easy to try to force God into a little box based on what I ‘expect’ of him, when I let him breath and move in my life, without my foolish (and often selfish) constraints, he never ceases to blow me away. Amen, sister!! 😉
Oh wow, this is SO something that spoke to me! Yikes, the times my husband and daughter have suffered because of impossible expectations that I have.
I just can’t wait to read this book! 🙂
Bonk! Right between the eyes! Thanks. I have no expectations of you replying to my comment. :>)
Thank you for reading my blog. I do very much appreciate you taking the time to look at what I have to say:)
Letting go of expectations – so hard. Especially when, as I suspect is true for you as well as me, the expectations of self are the hardest of all to meet. As I write this – the typing s hard – the words coming slowly – my body already sleep deprived because of an incurable insomnia – had no productive sleep last night, night bled into dawn, and now the world is awake, and I’m, although awake, am not really. But it’s just a thorn – it makes me better – even though I hate it. I only bring it up because I still have the same expectations of me – but I understand for the first time in life – “the spirit is willing – the flesh is weak”. SO I need to let go of the expectation a little. I am here. He is here. I’m doing what I do for him. It is good – even the thorn. This was so good. Thank you.
God Bless and keep you
May His face shine upon you…
and all of yours.
Sorry to hear about the insomnia. There are a few times where I’ve had insomnia (not for long) and I hated it. I can only imagine the frustration.
Hope you have a good day, regardless.