For A Season

16 Mar
wave crash

Ecclesiastes 3

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens

. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet[a] no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

I became comfortable in my life. There was a certain predictability, that brought not boredom to me, but security. I grasped hard. I wanted to hold on to what is…scared of what might be.

Fear does horrible things to a human heart.

It paralyzes. It cowers. It handicaps.

The grip of fear made me timid. It limited me.

Instead of stepping out into God’s plan, in confidence, I stayed back in the shadows. Unsure.

I needed to loosen my grip…and let it go.

My husband lost his job of nearly 23 years. It was no fault of his own. That is what made the news so much more difficult. I hated the economy. I hated the company’s decision, handed down my executives that didn’t even know us. I hated the change that swept over us like a dark wave of the ocean…we were drowning.

My grip tightened. My knuckles were white from the death grip I had placed on my life.

NO, God! NO!

I resorted to begging. Crying. Pleading.

Fear, it is a terrible thing. It preyed on me, like a wild animal. It wanted to devour me, to destroy me…..and I was letting it.

I’m not exactly sure when the change happened. I’m sure it was months into the unemployment, my working part time substitute teaching, with the help of family and friends. Never once did we miss a bill. We finished building the house we were right in the middle of constructing, when my husband lost his job.

I realized that things did work out for us. Life was not what it had been, but we were (and are) okay.

It might not have.

God spoke to my heart. No, not in an audible voice. And no, I was not having a break down. His Word echoed over the waves of the ocean, that were crashing all around me.

God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. (2 Timothy 1:7)

God did not want me to have fear of the unknown…He wanted me to trust. Trust Him. Trust Him and let it go. Let go of the fear.

5 Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,

“Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you. (Hebrews 13:5)

My security never came from things. Never from a steady paycheck. Never from money in the bank. Never from paying bills. Or being able to go out to eat on a whim. Never from knowing what each day held on the calendar.

My security was, and is, always in HIM. I had known this….but, it took a job loss…the strain…..the not knowing…..to be reminded.

Phil 4:19………”And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”

Mt 6:8…………”your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.”

Ps 34:10……….”…those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.”

I continue to stumble, but I am learning to let go…..

 

This week we are discussing “Letting Go” over at, A Holy Experience. Click on the WALK WITH HIM WEDNESDAY graphic on my right side bar, to read more!

 




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3 Responses to “For A Season”

  1. Susan Brown March 16, 2011 at 9:08 am #

    What a beautifully written post, Dawn! I so relate, as I have been where you are…when we have Him, we truly have everything!
    Blessings to you,
    Susan

  2. Martha L Shaw March 16, 2011 at 9:37 am #

    Inspiring post! I as well find myself in a similar fearful situation, but am also finding that I’ve learned where my strength comes from. I cannot say yet that I am “okay” as the world sees it since my lack of provision is a work in progress still, but I know that God has a plan!

  3. April Hawkins March 16, 2011 at 10:09 am #

    It is in these seasons of life that God teaches us what is truly important and we tend to see His blessings even more.

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